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Diary of a Loner by Aanu Odusola

Hey babe” I said as I hugged her when I got inside.
“Hope I’m not too late?” I asked,
“No, you’re right on time” She said.

She went ahead to bring out the food and set the table for us to eat. We sat at the dining table this time, not on the couch. It was a not-so-delicious meal of salt with a little bit of rice.

“Sorry about the food”, She said.
“Naaaa, its nothing,” I said, still hungry.
“Let me make another one” She said,
“I think I should make it this time” I said.

We looked at each other and knew that it was the right thing to do then we laughed. I made the rice, we ate and moved to the couch. I was expecting some ‘action’, like the last time and I was willing to wait patiently for her to show me the signs. I thought she would want to continue from where we stopped. How wrong I was.

“Ayo, I need to talk to you about something”, She said.
“Is this a break-up?” I asked.
“We’re not even “together” to start with” She said, breaking my fragile heart.

I thought I actually meant something though it was a short while but it seemed real. I had to be prepared for the worst. Well, the worst thing I knew I could hear was that she never wanted to see me again, bla bla, but I was going to be strong, no matter how it turned out.

“I lied about Boye” She finally spoke,
“Who’s Boye?” I asked,
“My husband” She replied.

I didn’t know what to say…yet since she hadn’t said the truth yet.

“He’s not dead” She said,
“What do you mean he’s not dead?” I asked surprised, that was the last thing I expected to hear.
“He’s in jail” She said,
“When I met you and we got talking, I didn’t want to have anything to do with you but we connected somehow and I just couldn’t bring myself to tell you the truth” She continued.
“Hmmmm….what’s he in jail for?” I asked,
“Drug trafficking” She said.
“This house is one of the properties we acquired, I came from a poor home but Boye changed my life and that of my family, he made me what I am today and I don’t think it’s fair doing this (she pointed at both of us) to him while we’re still married, I still love him Ayo, I’m sorry” She said, conclusively.

I didn’t know what to do or say, I knew I needed to spend some time alone, to get over her. I held her close for a while I digested everything I just heard.

She was right though, she shouldn’t cheat on her man, and even if she wanted to, not with me at least. I had nothing to offer except love and sex and I might not be faithful still.

“When would he be back?” I asked, wanting to know how much time I had to get over her.
“Next weekend” She said.
“I didn’t want to lie anymore, you’re the only one I’ve been this close to since it happened and I think you deserve to know the truth” She continued.
“I understand” I said. That was all I could say. I did understand. I really did.

“I have to leave Sewa, I need some time alone” I said,
“I understand, thank you for everything Ayo, I’m glad I met you, I have no regrets knowing you”, She said.
“Thank you too Sewa” I said. I had to leave.

I couldn’t bear the thought of being without her so soon. Why was I even pained? What was I even expecting from a mother of three? Or was she lying about the kids too? Well, I wasn’t going to ask her anymore questions. I just had to let it slide, not like it was going to change anything though.

As soon as I got to my apartment, I called my fluctuating girlfriend, broke up with her and she sounded indifferent about it. I was quite happy about that, I didn’t need any more trouble in my life. I’ve had enough. I wanted to be free, like Peter maybe, heartless. Sandra knocked on my door not long after. I wasn’t in the mood, I needed the peace and quiet. I needed to grieve. It was a short while but it felt deep and to even think that everything was a lie when I was nothing but honest. Well, I lied about my master’s programme but hers was too much, all at once. It was all good though. I knew it was going to end sooner or later but I didn’t think it would end as fast as this. That was the end of Sewa and I. We never spoke or saw again after that.

“Peter how far?” I said,

I slept over the thought of whether to tell Peter about Sandra and I or not, I had decided to tell him hence the phone call.

“I dey o, how you dey na, you dey come my side today?” He asked,
“I never know o, that your babe ehn” I said, going straight to the point,
“Which one?” He asked, like he had too much babes to the extent that he didn’t know who was who.
“That Sandra babe wey come that night” I responded.
Ehen, wetin do her?” He asked,
“She come my room yesterday” I said.
“How she know your room? Forget that one first, wetin she find come your room?” He asked.
“She be my landlord pikin, I been wan tell you but I forget so na so she come dey beg make I no report am for that night wey she come see you”, “I come tell her say no p but this girl no go, she con dey rub me” I explained,
“Chai, my guy, hope you no dull am?” He said, just the kind of response I expected.
“I no wan do sha but the girl just dey rub me, na she even do me sef, she tie my hand, even blindfold me join” I said,
“Kai kai kai, na Sandra do all this one, she never even try that style with me, I go tell her make she do am for me next time” He said. “You see say she make sense ba?” He said, “Ehn make I no lie, she try” I said.
“When I tell you that time say make you try am, you dey do mouth like mess, you don try am now, you con dey feel am” He said, “Abegi, my credit don finish, I fit stroll come your side later” I said,
“Ehn no yawa na, we go see”.

That settled. Back to the present now. It’s December already and our end of the year party is fast approaching. The one done every year for colleagues and customers of ‘Hey Jay’. My parents and siblings are coming this time and I’m still single.

They’re expecting me to introduce them to my life partner but I don’t even have one. I have my personal assistant though who acts like bae on several occasions since we still got “together” every now and then. Peter advised me to get serious with her but I don’t know, I’ve not decided yet. Oh, Peter eventually found someone who made love again and they finally got married, did I say find? He got married to Sandra, my landlord’s daughter not minding whatever she had done with his friends. True love indeed!

Seconds turned into minutes which also turned into hours then into days and weeks and tada! The end of the year party is here. Starts by eighteen o’clock. Apart from music, food and other things, one of the things we do is presentation of gifts to customers who have brought in a lot of money and also referred us the most, who through their referrals, we also made a lot of money. We give them and their spouses our latest design as a thank you. Topping the list of the customers to be awarded at this year’s even is Mr. B. I handle the presentation of gifts. Most of the customers usually come with their spouses.

“The best customer for this year goes to Mr. B., a round of applause for him as he mounts the podium with his beautiful wife” I said.

Somehow, his wife looked so familiar so I wanted her to get closer so I can take a closer look at her. Guess who it was? Sewa. Apparently, Mr. B. was Mr. Bolade or Mr. Boye.

“Thank you so much for this honor, not many organizations do this for their customers, infact I’ve not seen any, my wife and I are grateful for this” He said as we shook hands and I shook hands with Sewa too. She was startled but she managed a smile as they walked back to their seats.

“Hey, thank you for today” I said to my personal assistant, Joke after the party.

She had been so hard-working regardless of the kind of relationship we’d been having.
“I’m just doing my job but you’re welcome” She said. I realised I had a good woman by my side. She deserved more than I was offering and I was willing to let that change. I decided in my heart to get serious and hopefully marry her.

So help me God.

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About the author

Aanu is a freelance creative writer and a contributor at Crazitive Africans. You can find more of her pieces on her blog.